so in dealing with my grief (it's supposed to get better, right?), my initial thought was to consume as many peanut m&ms as humanly possible, then see how things went from there. which is exactly what i did last week. a dear friend supplied me with multiple bags of the chocolate-covered peanut ammunition and i fully admit that i ate almost an entire bag in one late-night sitting.
well, all that got me by the end of the week was a tummy full of peanut m&ms. i derived some comfort from my favorite candy (how could i not? they're delicious.), but not enough to affect any permanent change in my emotional stability.
so i tried something new tonight. i went running. and it was marvelous.
there's something about running, especially running in the dark, that renews and refreshes the spirit. there's something about focusing on putting one foot in front of the other that helps put things into perspective. there's something about physically exerting yourself that reminds you that you are alive. there's something about losing yourself in the beat of the music and the rhythm of your footfalls that helps you make sense of the world. there's something about pushing yourself up that hill that gives you hope that you will feel something again, someday.
i like this new thought. i think i'll give it a try for a while, then see how things go from there...